Drowning
by Julia2602
Summary: Oneshot / Following 9x01 / Callie goes back into the bedroom and trys to talk sense into Arizona again...


AN: A little oneshot I wrote after the season premiere. It was originally written in german...

If you find any mistakes you can keep and eat them! ;)

Drowning

**Callie POV**

The door to her bedroom was clangs shut. Callie could not hold back her tears. Mark was dead. They had pulled the plug. After 3 months of hope her daughter had finally lost her father.

Callie was alone. She was an emotional wreck.

Arizona blamed her, Alex and the entire world. But how could she not?

After all, Callie had broken her promise. The promise she gave her wife. Callie promised she would do everything possible so that they would not have to amputate Arizona's leg. However, the orthopedic surgeon had not been able to help her wife. She had been powerless.

Powerless.

Arizona distanced herself further and further from her. How should Calliope make her wife believe that she still had a reason to live her life? How would they survive together as a couple? Would Arizona's rejection evolve so much hatred, that this was the beginning of the end for this marriage?

Minutes, perhaps hours Calliope Torres stood in the middle of their apartment and sobbed.

They had been happy. Why did everything change so fast? What did they do to deserve this? What had Arizona done to deserve this?

At this moment, the Latina heard a faint cry from her daughter's room. Sofia was awake. Callie felt as if her legs go to jelly. She slumped to the floor. Exhausted.

Callie was at a point where she needed the emotional support of their wife the most. But right now it was impossible for her to depend on Arizona.

But Callie had no time to be exhausted. She had to be strong. She had to take care of Sofia. Her daughter needed her.

The Latina stood up to see why Sofia was crying.

- XxCalzonaxx-

**Arizona POV**

Arizona turned around and stared at the wall while she listened to Callie leaving the room.

How should she move on? Calliope had broken her promise. Her leg was gone. The person to whom she could rely on the most, the person whom Arizona trusted the most, this person had disappointed her. Arizona's career was gone. Her life was no longer like it once was. Why would she even get out of the bed?

Here she has a place for herself. A place, where she was alone all day. A place, where she could be angry at the whole world.

Callie's fault.

Alex's fault.

The plane was to blame. The doctors were to blame. The whole world was to blame for her suffering. Yes, the whole world was responsible that she only had one healthy leg. The whole world was responsible that her left leg was no longer a leg anymore. Only the remains of a leg, only an ugly stump.

Someone popped her pretty pink bubble and replaced it with darkness. So why should she get out of the bed when she was surrounded by darkness. It was all over. Her whole life was scattered in pieces.

Arizona was the victim.

- XxCalzonaxx -

**Callie POV**

Callie was glad, glad that she was able to calm her daughter down quickly and easily. Sofia was asleep again, and Callie went back into the living room.

The living room looked almost worse than Cristina's apartment before she moved in with Burke. But there was no time to clean up. She barely had time to do the dishes.

Callie wiped the tears from her face.

She needed Arizona. She needed the intimacy with her wife. She longed for the love of her life holding her, comforting her and whispering in her ear that everything was going to be okay.

Callie was drowning in guilt, drowning in emotional pain. How should it ever get better?

But Callie knew that Arizona was going to drown too. Arizona was laying in self-pity. The Latina knew that she had to get her wife out of this hole before it was too late.

Arizona had lost her super magic smile.

Callie took a deep breath. Should she try again? Should she go back into their bedroom and try to talk sense into Arizona?

She was scared. But she knew there was no other way. She had to risk getting yelled at again and being held responsible for the suffering of her wife.

She opened the door cautiously and entered the room. Arizona had not moved from an inch.

Callie closed her eyes and took a deep breath again as she tried to collect herself.

"Arizona." A quiet, desperate whisper. "Please!"

Ignorance.

"Arizona." Callie began again, this time with a firmer, louder voice. "Arizona, I need you! Sofia needs you. I know that there is no excuse and I should not have broken my promise. "

Callie paused. Arizona continued to ignore her.

"But Arizona, understand me here. I did not want to lose you. I cannot lose you. The alternative would have been your death. „Desperation.

This time, the blonde turned around. The blue eyes were ice cold.

"Then you should have let me die!"

Shock.

"Arizona, you cannot be serious!"

Anger.

"Now stop the self-pity. Wake up. We need you! I know it's hard ..."

"Hard? You know that it's hard? You've got no idea! My life is ruined! "

The rejection and the anger in Arizona's eyes were visible. Callie took a step back.

"Arizona." Callie said, now in a soft voice. "Your life is not destroyed. It is right in front of you! "

No reaction.

"Please. We need you. Sofia needs you. I need you. I'm exhausted. I can't continue living like this. I've lost my best friend. You're ignoring me. You're ignoring Sofia. Damn you're ignoring the whole world! You blame everyone for something that is no fault. I know that you've lost your trust in me. I know that it is perhaps too early to beg for you forgiveness. But I cannot do it all alone anymore. I NEED YOU! "

Despair swung again in Callie's voice as she backed away a few steps and slid down the wall. Again the tears were flowing as Callie sobbed uncontrollably.

It seemed to take hours in which she stayed in this position.

Eventually, she felt a warm hand on her left shoulder.

"There is nothing to forgive, Calliope."


End file.
